a wee retrospective.

things that i have discovered (or re-discovered) during the month of may:

• the midwest is flat. no, like, really flat. flatter than a native new englander can instinctively comprehend.
• falling down drunk in a hotel hallway can be comedic gold. especially if you are drunk on magic wine that does not give you a hangover in the morning.
• i have an enormous capacity to misread a situation.
• big plastic bangle bracelets.
• my man looks really good in a tux.
• horse tracks have limited culinary options, and a distinct inability to accurately assess supply and demand needs for soft pretzel consumption.
• if i get my hands on a little bit of resentment, i often have a really hard time letting it go.
• what a tornado siren sounds like.
• crispy leeks and lemon-butter sauce over linguini.
• seeing someone walking barefoot on the vegas strip at 11:00 pm will kinda make me want to hurl.
• 100 calorie packs (while they are still, generally, the devil) make remarkable convenient airplane snacks.
• the little black dress still fits.
  
• free breakfast is good. hot free breakfast is even better.
• when i am off of anti-depressants, certain things can make me incredibly sad for no good reason. on the other hand, certain things can make me incredibly happy for no good reason. it is, in essence, a trade-off.
  
• the drivers of the BWI airport parking shuttles can be assholes. especially at 1:00 am.
• it is nearly impossible to find a $5, 3-2 blackjack table on the vegas strip after dark. or during the day, come to think of it.
• american gladiators.
• travel-induced exhaustion.