Wednesday, June 07, 2006

of all the amazingly moronic things i've seen on tv lately...

...this, my friends, takes the proverbial cake.

last night, i saw an ad on tv advising me that, next time i happen to find myself belly-up to a bar, i should order myself a "cuervo black and cola". this will allegedly result in my having a good time. or falling down under the weight of my own stupidity. i can't remember which.

i mean, really - tequila and coke? of all the ridiculous ideas to foist upon an unsuspecting public! good god, that's disgusting, and no amount of media buy can convince me otherwise.

but kate, some will argue, this new cuervo black is supposed to have an oaky flavor. you know, like whiskey! jack and coke! great, right?

nice try, but no. i know that i will offend legions with this position, but it must be said: jack and coke is a bad drink. DadCat, who long ago earned his bonafides as an alcohol pontificator, made this sage observation to me way back when:

jack and coke? please. it's a waste of perfectly good jack, and a waste of perfectly good coke.


now i'm not gonna lie and say i've never had a jack and coke, or that if i suddenly found my apartment devoid of any inebriating substances save a bottle of jack and a can of coke, i wouldn't set about the mixing. but. one would be well served to drink something else - almost anything else - if at all feasible.

all of this is to say that the idea of a "cuervo black and cola" is one of the dumbest marketing gimmicks i've heard in a long time. hell, it's one of the dumbest things i've heard in a long time, period. it's dangerous to children and other living things, so for the good of humanity, have a gin and tonic instead.

17 comments:

Ari said...

I totally agree with you on the Cuervo and coke thing. Taquila is just gross. Anyhow what goes well with Coke is Jamieson. I mean rum is nice, but Jamieson makes the belly all warm inside.

elizalou said...

Not so much rushing out to try tequila and coke. I don't think it's such a fresh advertising campaign either because, hello, what don't people think of mixing with coke? There's a reason it hasn't been done up until now.

But tequila and Squirt (or Fresca), on the other hand, is fantastic.

And I do love me some whisky and coke. But I'm also too much of a wimp to drink whisky straight.

LaMuerta said...

I tended bar for 20 years, and I'm with you: GOOD tequila tastes great without a mixer. Good booze in general doesn't need a mixer, it's only the nasty stuff that needs cola (a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down ...).

Cuervo doesn't make a good tequila. Never has; apparently, never will.

But I'll bet those ads end up being really effective. I guarantee they're hitting their target like gangbusters.

LaMuerta said...

Tequila hatas try a shot of Patron Reposado straight out of the freezer. No salt, no lime, no nothing.

Mmmmmmmmm.

educand said...

I thought tequila was for margaritas. Hmm.

Toast said...

I'll sign on to what lamuerta said: Good liquor doesn't need a mixer. Jack Daniels is great straight up or on the rocks. Like your dad said, mixing it is a waste. Cheap tequila makes a great mixer in any number of drinks. Good tequila should be sipped straight.

BTW, I had several glasses of Cuervo Black straight up at a party recently. My brother in law had bought some and hated it because it really does deviate significantly from the standard tequila spectrum. It's interesting. Very distinctive flavor. Methinks, however, that it will flop. Whisky and tequila connoisseurs won't like it because it strays too far from either class. It won't sell as a mixer because it's too damned expensive.

Oh, and on the tequila front, I'm a Chinaco Anejo guy all the way. Thanks, Bartcop!

karen gsteiger said...

Ugh, tequila and coke? Sounds dreadful. I'm not a big tequila fan to begin with. It never sits well with me...

dorothy rothschild said...

I heard that commercial playing on the t.v. when I was in the other room and went tearing into the living room to see. Wha? Huh? Tequila and Coke? Gah! Wretched.

I always thought Jack and Coke was a redneck drink.

Cinnamon said...

Jack is not my favorite whiskey but if it's not in a mint julep I'll mix it with ginger ale, cause saying "I'd like a Jack and Ginger" just sounds cool. Although I prefer Jameson as well, with real ginger ale.

And in the mixing crazy stuff together dept., apparently there is a common Spanish drink that is cheap red wine mixed with coke. Haven't tried it, but I'll have to wait a while before I get the urge.

Mike said...

Well, I'm going to play devil's advocate. It might be good. I'd like the testimony of someone who has tried it (it's not going to be me) to say it's nasty before I'll agree it is. We've all had something, either a drink comobo or some food combo, that we thought was going to be horrible, but was pretty good. Like Coke Blak. So who knows?
Educand, I also agree that tequila is for margaritas and little else. But some people like it. I once watched someone order it straight (lamuerta, it was apparently a good tequila) and I was amazed, because such a thing has never dawned on me. Kate, I agree with you on the gin and tonic, although I dislike gin, but you and I are clear booze drinkers, and I would mix vodka with laundry detergent before I mixed jack and coke, but again, I wonder how we'd feel if we enjoyed these drinks ourselves.
Oh, forget that it's 9am and I'm at work, I'm going to go have a tequila and coke!!

LaMuerta said...

Toast, I don't think they're going after tequila or whiskey drinkers -- I think they, like Southern Comfort (I worked on that campaign, so I'm sure of the target demographic on that one), are going after young'uns who don't yet have any brand loyalty. In other words, "drink this because it's cool, young hipster!" I honestly think they have a pretty good shot.

I'll even try it, and I'm waaay past caring about any kind of cool factor.

ItsMe said...

Sorry to disgree, but tequila and coke is great. Don't knock it 'til you've tried it!

itsme said...

Oh, and btw, I'm 39, so if I'm considered a "yung'un" sounds good to me. More power to ya. Or, to me.

justin said...

i just found a bottle of tequila in my freezer, and a bottle of coke in my fridge...curious as to how these two would mix, i did a search on google to find some opinions on this, and ended up here!

seeing as how only one person had posted on actually trying it, i thought i'd say the hell with it and give it a shot...

its really not that bad! i don't think i'd go to a bar and intentionally order it, but if its all you got, then its definately tolerable...even kinda tasty!

Anonymous said...

I'm here for the exact same reason as Justin...this thread is ground zero for the "tequila and coke" debate.

And agreed, not something I'm likely to order in a bar...but not at all bad.

Eric Jasso said...

Patron is good...but Herradura is lovely. Nobody in Mexico I know drinks Patron. Trivia: who owns Patron and is responsible for it being imported into the USA? Think haircare.

Paul Mitchell. Yep.

Anonymous said...

It's not bad if you use a sweeter tequila like hussongs