as if i am not confused enough already.

i was sitting at home this morning, delaying the six block trek to work (life is tough, i know), and i came across this quiz via Shakespeare's Sister. I've seen a bazillion of these little time-wasting quizzes on a bunch of blogs, but had never taken the five minutes to do one - until this morning. seriously, i did not want to go to work.

so here are the results of my foray into computerized philosophy quizzes:

You scored as Utilitarianism.

Your life is guided by the principles of Utilitarianism: You seek the greatest good for the greatest number.

"The said truth is that it is the greatest happiness of the greatest number that is the measure of right and wrong."
--Jeremy Bentham

"Whenever the general disposition of the people is such, that each individual regards those only of his interests which are selfish, and does not dwell on, or concern himself for, his share of the general interest, in such a state of things, good government is impossible."
--John Stuart Mill

Utilitarianism 75%
Existentialism 70%
Justice (Fairness) 65%
Hedonism 50%
Nihilism 45%
Kantianism 35%
Apathy 20%
Strong Egoism 5%
Divine Command 0%

and the first thing that i thought was: what the fuck is utilitarianism?

i know that right now, somewhere, jared is cringing, but damned if i had any idea what utiliarianism was. i like to consider myself a fairly well informed person, but hell, i only took philosophy 101. it was 8:30 in the morning, i already had no life direction or sense of purpose anyway, and then this stupid piece of shit computer quiz tells me i'm guided by a principle of which i've never even heard??

so i did what any right-thinking person would do - i looked it up on wikipedia. utilitarianism sounds all right and all (i like helping people - hell, i work in nonprofitland, don't i?), but i'm not sure i'd finger it as the defining ideal of my life.

that means it's back to the drawing board on the whole guiding principle issue. thanks for nothing, internet.